On 23rd July 2024, the first National Policing Statement on Violence Against Women and Girls was published. The report highlights that at least 1 in 12 women will be victims of male violence each year, though the real number is likely higher. We are committed to ensuring this report – and the truths it reveals – are not forgotten. In each of our newsletters, we usually share the story of a woman who has recently used West Mercia Women’s Aid’s services, helping to bring the ‘one in twelve’ statistic to life through the voices of survivors. This month, however, we are sharing the story of Annabel – a woman whose death has prompted a national conversation about domestic abuse, coercive control and the devastating consequences of male violence against women.
This is Annabel’s story:
When people imagine someone experiencing domestic abuse, they often picture a woman who is isolated or vulnerable. But abuse can happen to anyone.
Annabel was a mother, a charity leader, a friend and an advocate for women affected by violence. She had spent years helping survivors rebuild their lives and co-founded an organisation supporting women who had experienced gender-based violence and displacement. To those around her, she was compassionate, capable and deeply committed to making a difference.
Behind closed doors, however, she was experiencing abuse from the man she loved.
When she made the decision to end the relationship, he killed her.
Annabel’s story, shared so movingly by her lifelong friend Catherine Milne in The Guardian, is a heartbreaking reminder that leaving an abusive relationship can be the most dangerous time for a survivor. It also challenges the myth that domestic abuse only happens to certain people or in certain circumstances.
At West Mercia Women’s Aid, we know that many survivors worry they won’t be believed because they appear confident, successful or independent. Others fear people will ask, “Why didn’t she just leave?” The reality is far more complex.
Abuse is about power and control. It often develops gradually, making it difficult to recognise until someone is already trapped by fear, intimidation, coercive control or threats. Even when someone is ready to leave, the risks can increase significantly, which is why specialist support is so important.
Every day, our team supports women who have experienced these realities. While every woman’s experience is different, many tell us they struggled to recognise the abuse at first, felt isolated from family and friends, or worried they wouldn’t be believed if they reached out for help. Through tailored support and safety planning, we help women regain confidence, rebuild their lives and move towards a future free from abuse.
Stories like Annabel’s are devastating, but they also reinforce why specialist domestic abuse services matter. Every conversation, every safety plan and every offer of support has the potential to save a life.
The National Policing Statement tells us that at least one in twelve women will experience male violence each year. Behind that statistic are mothers, daughters, sisters, colleagues, neighbours and friends.
Women like Annabel.
And women like those we support every day.
If this story has prompted you to think differently about domestic abuse, please help us keep the conversation going. By raising awareness, challenging harmful myths and supporting specialist services, we can all play a part in creating a future where no woman has to live in fear.
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See the full One in Twelve series here